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Thursday, December 07, 2017

Happy Converged Christmas at Tor

This is hilarious. The Macmillan executives who just shut down Pronoun have got to be eyeing serious cuts at Tor Books in 2018. At least Pronoun did what it was supposed to do.
Black Excellence: Honoring Kwanzaa through Science Fiction and Fantasy

It may be the holiday season, but for many people that goes beyond just Christmas or Hannukah. In my case, it means honoring my ancestors and culture through Kwanzaa. I’ve celebrated Kwanzaa alongside Christmas for nearly two decades now. While I no longer go through the whole ritual of lighting the mishumaa saba (seven candles) in the kinara (candleholder) or setting out the mazao (crops) and kikombe cha umoja (unity cup) on the mkeka (mat), I still try to honor the Nguzo Saba (Seven Principles) on which Kwanzaa was founded. One of the ways I do that is by spending the week of Kwanzaa focusing on work created by African Americans, from television to movies to comics to books to businesses and beyond.
It's always amusing to see people pretending to care about fake holidays for fake Americans. As for me, I like to celebrate Black Excellence during Kwanzaa by watching Serena Williams defeat an white girl half her weight in straight sets while listening to Puff Daddy's greatest hits, after which I read one of SFWA Grand Master Samuel L. Delaney's beautiful tales of true gay love between man and underage boy.

It's a very special time of year.

Labels: , ,

91 Comments:

Anonymous Brick Hardslab December 07, 2017 4:06 PM  

I'm sorry but I can't celebrate Kwanzaa. The fbi informant invented it and I won't appropriate feeb culture.

Blogger Matthew Funk December 07, 2017 4:07 PM  

I just popped by to drop the latest news in SJW comic land. How convenient that the topic just has to be SJW publishers, I don't need to preface this with an "Off Topic"

http://www.bleedingfool.com/blogs/sitterson-defends-socialism-gi-joe-spin-off-canceled/

Blogger pyrrhus December 07, 2017 4:10 PM  

It's impossible to parody these people, they do it too well...imagine celebrating the FBi invented Kwanzaa and spending a week reveling in the great achievements of black people, all 3 of them....

Blogger Thucydides December 07, 2017 4:10 PM  

Lighting seven candles? So Kwanzaa is actually a Jewish festival?

Blogger Matt December 07, 2017 4:17 PM  

Yo Thucydides, u aint know Da Jewz wuz rilly Afrakans??

We Wuz Kangz of Izrael

Blogger Kallmunz December 07, 2017 4:28 PM  

Well of course I love Christmas, but it is irksome that some idiots get to enjoy it. Do you think we can start a "Christmas is racist" theme for these retards?

OpenID leukosfash December 07, 2017 4:32 PM  

"Black Excellence." LMFAO!

Blogger Brad Matthews December 07, 2017 4:32 PM  

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas

Blogger tz December 07, 2017 4:36 PM  

Honoring ancestors? Kwanzaa was invented in 1966.
And all those strange words are Swahili which his ancestors likely never spoke (and is far more jarring than someone inserting random latin phrases into English).
Between the menorah, the gift exchange, and the rest, it appears to be a cargo-cult approach.
OTOH candles are appropriate if they want to burn down their town.

Anonymous Edjamacator December 07, 2017 4:37 PM  

Matt wrote:We Wuz Kangz of Izrael

"We wuz Joos?"

Blogger VFM #7634 December 07, 2017 4:41 PM  

Lighting seven candles? So Kwanzaa is actually a Jewish festival?

@4 Thucydides
Looks like it, especially considering that "saba" looks like the Hebrew word for "seven".

Blogger SDaly December 07, 2017 4:43 PM  

The Kwanzaa ship has sailed. Local schools (86% white, 10% Asian) used to make the kids sing a Kwanzaa song during the "winter" concert, but don't anymore.

Given that everything about Kwanzaa is a cheap imitation of other holidays, I used to joke with my kids about Malcolm, the Kwanzaa squirrel, who would gnaw through the siding to leave acorns for children.

Blogger Koanic December 07, 2017 4:44 PM  

Your racist rejection of Chuck Spears' contribution to There Will Be War ruined Kwanzaa, Prarie Grinch.

Anonymous Bobby Farr December 07, 2017 4:45 PM  

Odd that blacks seem as lacking in ethnic identity as whites despite the relative lack of African immigrants, their geographic isolation and constant pandering to by the elites. Yet, they still are so lacking in cohesion that they will ignore the last 200-300 years of their ancestry, are unable to distinguish themselves from foreigners like Obama and call all of Africa their home when their ancestors came from the West and the other areas are populated by their ancestors' enemies.

I suppose their ignorance serves as a useful example of the idiocy of the pan-white Spencerite Americans - the sort who like Cruz, call Kushner white, and propose converting to Catholicism or Orthodoxy.

Anonymous Steve Canyon December 07, 2017 4:49 PM  

So all those kids of those black/white couples on TV have to light what, 3.5 candles?

Anonymous Ages December 07, 2017 4:50 PM  

and propose converting to ... Orthodoxy.

Enjoy your convergence, (((Protestant))) debris.

Anonymous a deplorable rubberducky December 07, 2017 4:56 PM  

They must be watching us and keeping up on r/K selection theory. A girl named Alex wrote that piece. And from the webpage:

"Alex Brown is a teen librarian, writer, geeknerdloserweirdo, and all-around pop culture obsessive who watches entirely too much TV. Keep up with her every move on Twitter and Instagram, or get lost in the rabbit warren of ships and fandoms on her Tumblr."

Anonymous VFM #6306 December 07, 2017 4:57 PM  

Since Scalzi's washout, Patrick Neilsen Hayden appears to have vanished. Have the half-savages at Tor resorted to cannibalism?

They'll never go hangry again!

Anonymous Nathan December 07, 2017 4:59 PM  

"Keep up with her every move on Twitter and Instagram, or get lost in the rabbit warren of ships and fandoms on her Tumblr."

Not even once. Tumblr shippers make the blue-checked blue-hairs on Twitter appear sane.

Blogger Al From Bay Shore December 07, 2017 5:02 PM  

I loathe Kwanzaa. That is all.

Anonymous WaterBoy December 07, 2017 5:03 PM  

Vox: "...while listening to Puff Daddy's greatest hits..."

Wait...was that whole "P. Diddy, Diddy" thing just a Dallas dream, then?

Blogger Lazarus December 07, 2017 5:07 PM  

Thucydides wrote:Lighting seven candles? So Kwanzaa is actually a Jewish festival?

Practicing the Principles of Kwanzaa:
Repairing, Renewing and Remaking Our World


(((Tikun Olam)))

The Secret Jewish History of Kwanzaa

Read more: https://forward.com/news/356188/the-secret-jewish-history-of-kwanzaa/
https://forward.com/news/356188/the-secret-jewish-history-of-kwanzaa/

Blogger Matthew December 07, 2017 5:10 PM  

I like watching pretty white girls defeat Venus Williams, who in contrast with her sister, actually looks female and can move about the court in ways that are not best described as "a vigorous shamble".

Blogger Cataline Sergius December 07, 2017 5:16 PM  

Kwanza is based of Julius Nyerere's Ujamaa which turned the rich British colony of Tanganyika into Tanzania (AKA) the poorest shit hole in Africa and that's saying something.

The only guy I ever knew who actually practiced Kwanza was a black Marine. He was a NOI convert who needed something...anything to appease his still Christian mother during the holidays.

"What chu talk'in bout, MY grandbabies cain't have no Christmas! They are hav'in a Christmas! Because. It. Is. Christmas. Time."

Anonymous Steve December 07, 2017 5:18 PM  

I like the blacks, but it's not fair that they get to celebrate Kwanzaa AND Colonel Sanders' birthday.

Anonymous Scott December 07, 2017 5:18 PM  

"Umoja"
Unity: To strive for and to maintain unity in the family, community, nation, and race.

By practicing the underlying principles of Kwanzaa, you must, by their own definition of unity, be racist.

(I know that striving for the unity of your race doesn't make you racist unless you think like a progressive)

Blogger Danby December 07, 2017 5:26 PM  

It's that time of year
When the world falls in love
Every song you hear
seems to say
"Gibme dat,
make muh Kwaanza dreams come true."

Anonymous MillennialFalcon December 07, 2017 5:30 PM  

Alex Brown is on that Rachel Dolezal quest: https://i2.wp.com/www.tor.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/AlexBrown_2015pic.jpg?fit=0%2C%209999&crop=0%2C0%2C100%2C100

Anonymous BBGKB December 07, 2017 5:31 PM  

Instead of reading about more trannsniggers:

Matt Bracken is offering a free download of his Counter Caliphate novel, “The Red Cliffs of Zerhoun,” for free on Kindle this coming Friday. Sorry about mentioning the completion

We Wuz Kangz of Izrael "We wuz Joos?"

More accurately "We Was Sold By kangz to jooos"

Blogger Mr.MantraMan December 07, 2017 5:33 PM  

Blacks can celebrate what they want and how they want, but the white shitlibs deserve the dunking chair till I'm tired.

Blogger Beau December 07, 2017 5:39 PM  

Here is a fitting scripture honoring the spirit of Kwanzaa,

For my people have committed two evils; they have forsaken me the fountain of living waters, and hewed them out cisterns, broken cisterns, that can hold no water. Jeremiah 2:13

Blogger Danby December 07, 2017 5:40 PM  

Mr.MantraMan wrote:the white shitlibs deserve the dunking chair till I'm tired.
we'll take shifts

Blogger Azure Amaranthine December 07, 2017 5:41 PM  

""We wuz Joos?"

Ironically, that's exactly how it works.

Anonymous MillennialFalcon December 07, 2017 5:44 PM  

Seriously, the girl who wrote that is as white as Shaun King. Squeezing every ounce of that one drop theory into this piece.

Blogger Thucydides December 07, 2017 5:47 PM  

I asked how they were planning to celebrate Eid and Diwali on the Tor page. Any over/under for when it is scrubbed and the ban hammer comes down?

Blogger Gordon December 07, 2017 5:48 PM  

Buffalo Soldier by Maurice Broaddus

Genocide. The Buffalo Soldiers took the white devils' coin to slaughter my ancestors. Vox's also. Call them by their real name: Einsatzbüffelsoldaten.

Anonymous Brick Hardslab December 07, 2017 5:55 PM  

Thank you Beau. That is perfect.

Blogger Arthur Isaac December 07, 2017 5:58 PM  

I asked how they were planning to celebrate Eid and Diwali on the Tor page. Any over/under for when it is scrubbed and the ban hammer comes down?

If you'd have asked about just one they would have had to deliberate. That you brought up two is a sign to even the idiotic, 6 hours.

Blogger tuberman December 07, 2017 6:05 PM  

"Kwanzaa was invented in 1966." By a CIA asset...those ass..ets have been all over all discord.

Anonymous Anonymous December 07, 2017 6:12 PM  

"Black Excellence: Honoring Kwanzaa through Science Fiction and Fantasy"

Makes perfect sense.

- Mobutu

Blogger Jon D. December 07, 2017 6:18 PM  

Incidentally, Patrick Neilsen Hayden signalled to me he hated Christianity by blocking me on twitter when I proposed he put his faith in Christ and not worldly things after he was ranting about having no faith in "the system".

Anonymous BBGKB December 07, 2017 6:28 PM  

(((Judge))) won't allow evidence against Epstein

http://www.thedailysheeple.com/judge-protects-billionaire-pedophile-wont-allow-damning-evidence-in-child-rape-trial_122017

Anonymous Luke December 07, 2017 6:32 PM  

36. Gordon December 07, 2017 5:48 PM
Buffalo Soldier by Maurice Broaddus

"Genocide. The Buffalo Soldiers took the white devils' coin to slaughter my ancestors. Vox's also. Call them by their real name: Einsatzbüffelsoldaten."

Thread winner for coining that word, hands down. Empires have long used divide-and-conquer, pitting one group they deemed of low value against another, usually for a pittance of reward.

Anonymous E Deploribus Unum December 07, 2017 6:42 PM  

@Beau for thread winner: "Here is a fitting scripture honoring the spirit of Kwanzaa ..."

Anonymous Locke December 07, 2017 6:42 PM  

Does he murder anyone to honor the founder?

Blogger Weouro December 07, 2017 6:44 PM  

Ah yes, the venerable Piddy, one of the fathers of hip rap, whose obese partner Big Boy was killed by some other, unknown, hip rap luminaries. Big Boy, along with Two Pock, became the principle Kwanzaa saints.

Anonymous Anonymous December 07, 2017 6:51 PM  

Hysterical post. Bayete, Inkosi!

- Mobutu

Blogger bw December 07, 2017 6:58 PM  

fake holidays for fake Americans

Once again, just because. No need to expound or point out or add. Saved us the time.

by watching Serena Williams defeat an white girl half her weight..

Hopefully our recently retired girl Anna is now ready to pop out 2-3 Ortho winners.

Blogger Dave December 07, 2017 7:00 PM  

Former(?) Tor Author: Wright on What’s Wrong with Christmas

https://www.dangerous.com/37930/wright-not-just-decor-left-truly-hates-christmas/


Since my pay from this website depends entirely on advertising, visit my column several times, and tell all your friends to do likewise, and pressure members who want to enter your World of Warcraft guild that whoever racks up the most click-through on my article is in.

I originally thought that this Dangerous column would take the place of my Last Crusade column, but the two are different in tone and purpose. Somehow, if heaven permits, I will find the time to do both.

But, sadly, this means I have to push back my date for finishing Nowhither, which is my current project.


Push back Nowhither? Say it ain't so, Joe.

Blogger James December 07, 2017 7:01 PM  

SDaly wrote:

Given that everything about Kwanzaa is a cheap imitation of other holidays, I used to joke with my kids about Malcolm, the Kwanzaa squirrel, who would gnaw through the siding to leave acorns for children.


U had sidin' an' a squirrel? Sheeit, man, you was lucky. We had Rufus da Kwanzaa rat chewin' through da newzpaper. An' dat fucka din leave nuffin cept turds.

Anonymous WaterBoy December 07, 2017 7:02 PM  

Weouro @46: "Big Boy, along with Two Pock, became the principle Kwanzaa saints"

Not the only ones, either; don't forget Saint Malcolm and Saint Marcus.

From the FBI monograph on Ron Karenga:

"US celebrates February 2l--called Ahahibu--commemorating the "assassination" of "Brother Malcolm X," and May 19--called Kuzaliwa--the date Malcolm X was born. Malcolm X was a Negro militant named Malcolm K. Little who, as a member of the NOI,assumed the name Malcolm X. He was murdered February 21, 1965, while making a speech in New York City.

US is contemplating establishing another holiday honoring Marcus Garvey, the black nationalist leader of the 1920's who engineered an unsuccessful back-to-Africa movement. The Watts festival--called Uhuru--which was first held in Los Angeles, August, 1966, commemorates the riots that occurred there the year before and is also celebrated by members of US.
"

Blogger Gordon December 07, 2017 7:05 PM  

U had sidin' an' a squirrel? Sheeit, man, you was lucky. We had Rufus da Kwanzaa rat chewin' through da newzpaper. An' dat fucka din leave nuffin cept turds.

--the four Harlemshiremen

Blogger James Dixon December 07, 2017 7:17 PM  

> ...while listening to Puff Daddy's greatest hits...

For Christmas, I'd recommend something slightly different: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7EgZAajTf08

Anonymous VFM #6306 December 07, 2017 7:20 PM  

Kwanzaa, so important that not even black people celebrate it.

Anonymous dr kill December 07, 2017 7:25 PM  

Shirley Q. Liquor's 12 Days of Kwanzaa always gives me the Holiday Spirit.

Blogger Longtime Lurker December 07, 2017 7:30 PM  

"Einsatzbüffelsoldaten."

Wicked funny. Keep up the good work!

Blogger Silly but True December 07, 2017 7:51 PM  

Mary Beard noting that the ancient Third Reich army and SS was full of Africans in 3... 2... 1...

Anonymous Morgan December 07, 2017 7:51 PM  

I had someone who claimed to write for Tor Books, Brad Smith, go berserk on me on social media Sunday for linking my Castalia House blog post. It ended when some friends did a good imitation of a Vile Faceless Minions swarming. He was unhinged.

Anonymous JAG December 07, 2017 8:04 PM  

Silly but True wrote:Mary Beard noting that the ancient Third Reich army and SS was full of Africans in 3... 2... 1...

I remember when the left tried claiming everyone in history was gay. Now, everyone in history is black. Next move, I suspect, is the left claiming everyone in history was a tranny.

Anonymous Sigh December 07, 2017 8:15 PM  

"the black nationalist leader of the 1920's who engineered an unsuccessful back-to-Africa movement."

Why oh why couldn't at least ONE black idea have been competently implemented?

Blogger Dire Badger December 07, 2017 8:22 PM  

My christmas cheer usually involves making a bunch of nativity scenes and crosses out of logs and branches and setting them up everywhere I know someone will be offended... The local schools, government buildings, community centers, and freeway interchanges are favored targets.
It's cheap, impossible to miss, and each set of figures takes at most half an hour to cut, drill, assemble, and place.

And sometimes a few of them even survive the season.

Blogger Silly but True December 07, 2017 8:42 PM  

Bryan Singer's got another teen-rape accuser.

This time from 2003 at a yacht party. The yacht was owned by "tech investor" Lester Waters.

Lo and behold: http://gaypronet.blogspot.com/2014/01/people-attending-on-16012014.html?m=1

So is he gay or boy pedo?

Anonymous GhettoCaroler December 07, 2017 9:35 PM  

It's beginning to look a lot like Kwanzaa
Everywhere you go
Take a look in the nearest 'hood, glistening real good
With abandoned cars and shopfronts all aglow
It's beginning to look a lot like Kwanzaa
Watching every whore
But the prettiest sight to see, is the bitches that will be
On your own front door....

Anonymous Avalanche December 07, 2017 9:36 PM  

From the interview: "Quick Kick and Snake Eyes beat the bejeezus out of each other for a full half an issue, after all – but I didn’t want to do too much of it, as it would work at crosspurposes with the idea that all of these people know, respect and care about one another."

So, this guy has never actually BEEN around any real men? (Well, except maybe the one who stuffed him in his locker?!) Never read La Morte d'Arthur? Never visited a dojo or a boy's camp?!

Does this mean he's going to write scenes where the armed and violent men play dolly-dress-up and serve fake tea in miniature cups?

Anonymous Avalanche December 07, 2017 9:42 PM  

@29 "Matt Bracken is offering a free download of his Counter Caliphate novel, “The Red Cliffs of Zerhoun,"

Matt's a surprisingly good writer. I've read his trilogy: not 'high literature' but it sure keeps you reading!

Blogger Mountain Man December 07, 2017 9:53 PM  

The sarcasm is strong with this one...must say I rather like it .

Blogger LP9 December 07, 2017 10:04 PM  

Perfect! Wonderful!

Horror show at Tor, just watch Vox and his staff do rings around them, the truth and their best writers rise to the top.

Anonymous MhA December 07, 2017 10:04 PM  

Jew Wars: Mary Sue Strikes Back update...
Leaked Star Wars spoilers describe a background cosmology in which women are inherently superior to men, whose bitter jealously causes all the problems in the … everything. Because this is a Jew Jew Abrams joint, absolutely no thought was given to what that means in a fantasy universe densely diversified with non-human life forms.
tldr The Dark Side of the Force is literally vagina envy.

This very ancient tree was the first life form in the Star Wars galaxy, it was called the Mother Tree. The Tree gave birth to 2 humanoid creatures, a brother and sister. The sister was given the power to create life and she would think it up and release it into the sky where the “life force” would spread to other planets. *Brother was created to be her servant,* but he was jealous and one day fought her in order to make her submit to him. He killed her, but he was wounded in the battle, the Tree herself was also dying (as brother stole her life force to make himself eternal), but the Tree made a last prophecy that the sister would be reincarnated and *make brother submit to her* yet again in the future. Brother over eons eventually made technology to leave the planet on his own, and over the centuries he hid in the shadows.

It also is explained that the reincarnation MUST be a woman, since the pureness of the light side is feminine. Although males and females can tap into either the dark or light side, the pure dark side is always males, and the pure light side is always females. In the Last Jedi, Luke confers to Rey that he always thought that he would be the prophecised one, just as his father Anakin also thought the same of himself. But Luke then realizes the *true savior of the galaxy must be a woman.*

And yes, the above plot point was an idea of Kathleen Kennedy, she along with the other female assistants and co-producers made this a requirement for this and the last film in this trilogy.

Blogger Johnny December 07, 2017 10:06 PM  

Festivus is better than Kwanzaa. Easier to spell and with a fairly obvious pronunciation.

Anonymous Avalanche December 07, 2017 10:06 PM  

Interesting tidbit from a non-mainstream historian friend:

All this Kwanzaa mumbo-jumbo is written in Swahili.

Swahili is not a Black language.

It's a kind of pidgin Arabic devised by the Muslims to use with their helpers in the slave trade.

Anonymous Avalanche December 07, 2017 10:09 PM  

@65 "This very ancient tree was the first life form in the Star Wars galaxy, it was called the Mother Tree. "

Wasn't that James Cameron's Avatar movie? (Does he get royalties?)

Blogger Johnny December 07, 2017 10:09 PM  

>>But Luke then realizes the *true savior of the galaxy must be a woman.*

I can no longer tell what is a spoof and what is not.

Blogger Noah B The Savage Gardener December 07, 2017 10:20 PM  

Bryan Singer is a Jewish American film director.

Blogger Dire Badger December 07, 2017 10:24 PM  

"The True savior of the Galaxy must be an Ewok named "Eats his own poop."

Fixed it.

Anonymous Man of the Atom December 07, 2017 10:33 PM  

MhA wrote:
And yes, the above plot point was an idea of Kathleen Kennedy, she along with the other female assistants and co-producers made this a requirement for this and the last film in this trilogy.


Vox writing "SJWs Always Project" may in fact destroy the space-time continuum with the examples from Reality that are being driven forward by the force of his will.

SDL, you may want to tone down that field generator just a notch.

Anonymous Man of the Atom December 07, 2017 10:38 PM  

MhA wrote:
Mary Sue Strikes Back update...

Genesis 3:16, writ extra-large.

Blogger LP9 December 07, 2017 11:21 PM  

60 you have no idea of the poverty applaihcan fatalism in WV, the churches are converted into re hab centers while I am thought of as special when I drink it all away, its the only way, its horrible. the pain never stops I have to beg them for favors for dad.


Blogger LP9 December 07, 2017 11:24 PM  

I am sorry please pastor Beau everyone I am solid I just cannot bear the reality I am, forced to endure - I am sorry.

Anonymous Mr. Rational December 07, 2017 11:36 PM  

You have my sympathy, LP9.

Blogger Silly but True December 07, 2017 11:59 PM  

((Bryan Singer)) is a Jewish American film director.

Wait. Where's the third parenthesis? The Secret Historians of ((Kwanzaa)) keep stealing it since they became part of the tribe.

Anonymous Gen. Kong December 08, 2017 12:57 AM  

I thought the only proper sellubation of de Kwanzaa holidayz wuz wit Drano, duck tape, handscuffs n lektical cords. That was how the great Mauna Karenga celebrated.

LP you are in our prayers, dear lady.

Blogger Cloudbuster December 08, 2017 4:15 AM  

Karenga (creator of Kwanzaa and a convicted felon for felonious assault and false imprisonment) is the Chair of the Africana Studies Department at California State University, Long Beach.

A May 14, 1971, article in the Los Angeles Times described the testimony of one of the women:

"Deborah Jones, who once was given the Swahili title of an African queen, said she and Gail Davis were whipped with an electrical cord and beaten with a karate baton after being ordered to remove their clothes. She testified that a hot soldering iron was placed in Miss Davis' mouth and placed against Miss Davis' face and that one of her own big toes was tightened in a vise. Karenga, head of US, also put detergent and running hoses in their mouths, she said. They also were hit on the heads with toasters."[17]


Consider how debased a culture has to be for a man like this to rise to a top position at a major university.

Blogger Koanic December 08, 2017 4:43 AM  

> whipped with an electrical cord

With that kind of excitement, Nora would never have left the Doll House.

Anonymous Causal Lurker December 08, 2017 8:25 AM  

This is why dyslexics should never have blogs:

and Honoring Kwanzaa Fiction through Science Fantasy

FIFH

Anonymous rienzi December 08, 2017 10:35 AM  

What I like best about Kwanzaa are the beautiful carols: "Violent Night", "Jungle Bells", "Loot the Halls"; so inspiring!

Anonymous Mr. Rational December 08, 2017 10:49 AM  

rienzi, you need to post spit-take warnings on those things!

Anonymous John VI December 08, 2017 1:36 PM  

Malcolm, the Kwanzaa squirrel. Thanks. :) that made me laugh. I'm totally stealing that to abuse my kids diversity teachers with.

Anonymous John VI December 08, 2017 1:42 PM  

Screw shifts. You are going to need bleechers and a streaming channel.

Blogger Dire Badger December 08, 2017 4:17 PM  

rienzi wrote:What I like best about Kwanzaa are the beautiful carols: "Violent Night", "Jungle Bells", "Loot the Halls"; so inspiring!

Dude, I almost choked to death on my sandwich.

Blogger The Aardvark December 09, 2017 1:26 AM  

In the late '90s, we bought a string of Christmas lights, and applied them to the vintage aluminium tree we had, but they just did not look right. We looked carefully, and noted there were no blue bulbs.

There were yellow, green and red bulbs.
We had a string of Kwanzaa lights.

Blogger Were-Puppy December 09, 2017 5:56 PM  

Yo Dawg it bout time to walk down tha skreet to the fleaq market and loot some squanzaaa giftses!

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